(Mine Will Kill Me)
I just wanna start off by saying, I haven’t slept in a while, so I’m in a pissy mood. If you don’t wanna hear me rant, fuck off!
Bi-polar – is a stupid fucking term or “condition”, and the people who claim it, can fuck themselves! Being nice one minute, and being a dick the next, doesn’t mean you’re bi-polar, it means you’re normal. Stop trying to label yourself with a fucking “condition”, just so you somehow feel special in your own little fucked up way.
Protestors – wake the fuck up, and look at the world around you! I’m being critcized for not doing as much as protestors?! By someone who doesn’t protest, no less. The argument is, “well if they’re out protesting, at least they’re doing more than you, you’re not doing anything to help.”. Okay, this is partially true. No, I do not go protest(unless it’s for some silly gimmick on youtube, to rile up pathetic ass, Juggalo trash), BUT, I am doing the same amount as protestors are. I’m just saving myself $4.50 on poster boards, and glitter paint. From a statistical stand-point, protestors almost never make a difference in any way whatsoever. Sure, they bring a lot of attention(in some generic cases, i.e., gay marriage rallies)(not against gay marriage, if idiots wanna bring law into a relationship, I don’t think there should be rules on who gets to, and who doesn’t), the casual on-looker who is driving by, saying, “hmm, wonder what that is?” or the teenagers who drive by yelling expletives out the window, while honking the horn and flipping them off, but really, it’s a waste of time. People go protest for 2 reasons…well, really, it’s more like 1 and a half. Let me explain…
You fuckers protest because you believe in something, and wanna voice your opinion(not always the case though, some people just wanna follow the trend of their friends, understandable, but that’s not my fucking point)…
The other reason you protest is this, you want the attention, and you wanna feel like you’re part of something. You need that self-gratification, your own little pat on the back, like you did something good. Nothing wrong with that, however, it does show that you’re only protesting for your own personal gain, and you could nearly give a fuck less about what you’re protesting. I kind of chalk it up to hippie douche bags, sitting around with their acoustic guitar jamming about LSD, Ecstasy, peace, more drugs, and some bullshit about keeping the Earth clean. Don’t get me wrong, KEEP THE FUCKING EARTH CLEAN, but realize, your faggotory song about cleaning isn’t gonna be as effective as slapping someone in the face, and telling them to clean up their shit!
VIOLENCE, PEOPLE!
This is where you’re gonna solve things. Sure, wouldn’t it be grand if we all lived in a world of hand holding, singing kumbayfuckingya, while flowers bloom, and the air is rich?! Of course, right? Hell, I’d love for Santa Claus to be real, too, but REALITY CHECK, MOTHER FUCKER, HE’S NOT, and we don’t live in that kind of world, and we never will! Look at the progression of our society as humanity. Do we not kill each other a little faster every year? Next question, if you have to, do you wanna be the one doing the killing, or do you wanna be the one getting killed?! Next question, what do you REALLY wanna do with your life?!
Since this is a rant, I don’t feel the need to segway, I’ll just keep going…
If you’re reading this, and you’re asking yourself, “how can this guy say such things, or be such an inconsiderate, judgemental prick, and dare call himself open-minded?”, allow me to answer…I’M NOT THAT OPEN-MINDED! I’m pretty fucking one way or the other, just like everyone else. What the fuck does it mean to be open-minded? What, you’ll listen to a conflicting issue, try to see where the opposition is coming from, but still stand firmly behind your beliefs, never compromising them too much? To me, that sounds like bullshitting your way through a conversation, so as to “keep the peace”, and not “press the issue”, which is also referred to as, “backing down”. So FUCK YOU “open-minded” people, you’re full of shit! You’re either one way, or you are the other. There’s no little middle ground, ride the fence bullshit, you either are, or you’re not. So I’ll gladly keep my mind closed, as to repel the bullshit that may try to enter. You folks could likely hit me with this…”well you used to believe in praying to God, and because of the things around you, you changed your beliefs!”. Very true. I’m also a walking contradiction…
I can assure you this, however…everything said in this rant, is how I truly feel. It’s not what I always say, and the reason I speak so openly about these things is because they’re all things I have personally done, or experienced, either physically or mentally. So in a way, I’m bitching myself out as well.
The sky just isn’t the same, to me.
Life means more and less, to me.
Death is my only certainty.
Happy, sad, bitter, angry, tired, awake.
It all feels like it’s happening at once, and the only thing I can do to make me feel any better, is to tear those closest to me apart.
So for my next, and final question, I ask…
Why can’t I stop loving you all?
Until the next bug crawls up my ass…
It’s been fun, take care!
X-Cal
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